Riddle me this

In Phoenix, we have car pool lanes. During commuter hours, you need two passengers or risk a $350 fine. We do this to save gas when we save rides.

Exhibit A – Scion

2008 Scion xB
 32 mpg at 65 mph

Exhibit B – an asshole in an ’06 Mustang

32 mpg at 65, 22 @ 100

Exhibit C – Mr. President

Lincoln Continental car pool
9 mpg at 30; 9@ 65

So, what do we have:

A – 32 person (1) miles per gallon – car pool violation

B – 28 person (1) miles per gallon – car pool violation
44 person (2) miles per gallon – felony speed but knock yourself out on the car pool, kids

C – 18 person (2) miles per gallon – knock yourself out on the car pool, kids

So exactly how are we saving gas worthy of a car pool in a ’78 Lincoln?

Karma:  You asshole.  You are the worst person ever, driving a Lincoln in the car pool lane when you coulda bought a Prius.

Assholes

Ford Flex
Kiss my ass, not crash my car

The scenario:  Dumbass wants in on a turn lane, without the usual courtesies like signaling or merging at the end of the line.  No, we are all supposed to get out of the way so he can get in where he chooses, instead of where conditions dictate. So, he forces his way in behind me into a space a couple sizes too small so his ass hangs over into the next lane.

So far, not my problem.  Except it is, because the dude is so concerned about his ass that he creeps into my car.  He literally pushes my car trying to cure his mistake.  Thanks asshole.

Ford Flex AZ AKD8035

(Yes, Lurlene was with me.  No, she was not hitting him with the pressed ham before this happened)

Chevrolet Cobalt
The door edge guards don’t actually help in a sideswipe

The scenario:  Dumbass can’t pick a lane.  (Duh ^^^).  Except for the one I am in.  He likes that in all four dimensions.  Missed me by that |<—————->| much.

(Yes, Lurlene was with me.  No, she was not  hitting him with the pressed ham before this happened)

Chevy Cobalt AZ 899-VLW

Don’t Fuck with me, I know Karate

A little wired, perhaps?

A two lane on ramp, that merges to one after signals.

I am first on the ramp.  I am first to the light.  Some asshole comes up from the right, but again, I am first.

La la la.

It’s now  like this: (5 southbound lanes)

  1. SB Carpool lane to EB I-10
  2. SB to EB I-10
  3. SB to EB I-10
  4. SB to EB 202
  5. SB entrance lane/exit to WB I-10.

View Larger Map
So this lane (5) goes to WB I-10.  I don’t want that.  I want EB 202, which is the next lane over (4). Clear. Merge. NBFD, right?  However, Mr. tough guy is evidently pissed about ‘losing” some sort of on ramp race to my xoxbox.  So, he is going to George Costanza merge from 5-4 before me.  Whoops!  Foiled.

“Goddammit, I am not putting up with this shit!”

  • Horn
  • 4-3
  • finger, horn, pass
  • finger, 3-4

Whoo, boy, you showed me, dude.

More finger.  Then 4-5.

That’s right.  The lane he wanted to be in was the lane he started this exercise in. One half mile, four lane changes and a windburned bird finger and blistered horn finger later, and Einstein is exactly where he would be if he wasn’t so road raged into showing me he was faster.

I guess I got schooled.

There’s too many self-indulgent wieners in this city with too muchbloody money!

Left lane bandit 0.  Self important douchebag 1

A Ferrari driver has been arrested after he attacked the owner of a Fiat 600 which had not given way to him as he tried to overtake it on an Italian motorway.

The 32-year-old driver of the £166,000 Ferrari 458 with a top speed of 200mph repeatedly rammed the small car when his attempts to pass it were frustrated.

The man, who has not been named, eventually forced the Fiat 600, worth £7,750 and with a top speed of 93mph, on to the hard shoulder, and then he smashed a window and set about beating up the 32-year-old inside.

via Ferrari driver arrested after bashing Fiat 600 off road for not allowing him to overtake | Mail Online.