“Ass-Engined Nazi Slot Cars”

Porsche 911
That’s a lot of junk in that trunk – oh wait…

We’ve spun out in all the variants from the 912 to the shovel-nosed 930. We’ve twisted driveshafts in all the Carrera 4s. We’ve compared 911s to everything from Corvettes to De Loreans to motorcycles to airplanes. The best line ever published about a Porsche was in this very magazine in 1980, when P.J. O’Rourke called it an “ass-engine Nazi slot car.”

Car and Driver

Continue reading ““Ass-Engined Nazi Slot Cars””

Legacy Car Problems

2015 Mustang?
ILLUSTRATION BY JON SIBAL VIA CARANDDRIVER.COM

2015 Ford Mustang: 25 Cars Worth Waiting For 2014–2017 – Future Cars – Car and Driver.

While the current Mustang is slavishly, unimaginatively retro, Ford has pretty much mined out its glory days, the as-yet unrealized Mustang II redux notwithstanding. So the next car will be fearlessly modern. Many Mustang faithful are up in arms at the ­prospect of Ford’s next hot rod looking too much like the 2011 Evos concept car, but we have confidence. Between the Focus and the Fusion, Ford’s styling department is on a hot streak.

The current S197 Mustang has been a wild success for Ford, recalling, and sometimes relentlessly aping the styling of late 1966-1970 Mustangs.  This latest rendering of the 2015 Ford Mustang by Car and Driver switches the derivative look  from its own storied history to its Ford stablemates, particularly the Fusion, and to would-be competitors like the Hyundai Genesis Coupe (and maybe even the Nissan 370Z). Continue reading “Legacy Car Problems”

David E. Davis Was Wrong

He said the A-bodies would be the most successful GM cars ever.  Why was he wrong?

  • No v. 1.0 models exist any longer.  There are plenty of 1.5s like this – well, more than zero – and you can’t swing a dead cat without hitting a 2.0.  Still, Cadillac Escalade.  Boom, roasted.
  • This?  AYFKM?  Yellow on the outside, brown on the inside?  Bizarro world dog turd is what that is.
Buick Century 1.5
Chocolate velvet on the inside

Nevermind that Papa Don drove one like this – he got the employee discount, or, more likely, they paid him to take this shitbox.

Nevermind too, that Phid introduced me to the song Delirious in the 1982 version of this car.

CMU road trips.