Cop or Not?

Damn you, fast shutter speed
Damn you, fast shutter speed

Innocuous looking Chevy Malibu, AZL 744VKFW.  What you don’t see is two rows of red/blue cop lights in the rear window, going off like a Fremont St. casino on meth.  Somehow, in two shots, I could not capture the cop candlepower.

Anyway, welcome to Phoenix.  We’ll dress up like traveling vacuum salesmen, just to separate you from your $ under the guise of traffic safety.

Deja vu?

Out of body experience
Out of body experience

Am I coming or going?  Some days it’s so hard to tell.  Or maybe it’s future Austin Powers, from 30 seconds from now.

Barrett Jackson 2009: Indulge Your Inner Fake Cowboy President

1983 Cadillac presidential limousine mockup
Trickle Down Armor Plating

Barrett Jackson once again taunts me with a fake presidential limo.  Last years car was an armored mock up of the Clinton 1997 limo.  This time, it’s the mock up for the Reagan car (1983 Cadillac Fleetwood).  This car was used in In the Line of Fire, making it look like a real presidential limo, instead of an ordinary black limo from a livery service.

For the untrained observer, the TV wing on the trunk is the first dead giveaway that it’s a fake.  Also the lack of armor or BFG 9000s in the fenders

Acid Flashback Thursday: 1979 Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme

1979 Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme
This is not your driver’s ed teacher’s Olds – oh wait, it is

It’s a slow, gloomy Tuesday commute, when out of nowhere, this cream-colored nightmare comes storming into view.

Not only is it exhibit A in how to take America’s most successful car of the day, the ‘77 Cutlass, make it smaller (good), even less powerful (bad), and less aggressive, by halving the number of lights (emasculatingly bad).  Then, for ’79, change the grille to make it even uglier. (Two fat sections per side instead of three more slender ones.)

Still, in a world where Thunderbirds and Monte Carlos were the shit, this isn’t the worst  thing out there – the 4 door slantbacks with fixed rear windows take that prize.

This was the exactly car I took my high school driving test in.  Thanks again to my now dead instructor for that D+.  That right there is the sole reason I am not your president this very minute.

(I at least did better than Laura Haas with the nice “aas”)